He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
my mind is a poorly written porno when i'm drunk.
just hooked up with an air force officer in a hotel room paid for by the military. i feel like i should go around thanking taxpayers for the assist.
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
Apparently I covered myself in sunscreen before I went to bed. Im just assuming that due to the fact I found an empty bottle of sunblock
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
Why can't all sociopaths be as fabulous as me?
It was extremely weird and uncomfortable mid blow job she looks up and says " tell me Simon Cowell makes your dick hard"
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
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