3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
My biology professor just used the phrase "dick fairy" in a sentence. No, it didn't make more sense in context.
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
Just sharpening my eyeliner with a butterfly knife. You know. Typical weekday morning.
Oh FYI, people asked how/why I met you and I didn't want to say "drunk at a party on an air mattress" so I made a story up. It was a very cute and charming story with no alcohol.
I'll have to text you later. Trying to have civilized conversations with the boyfriends parents when I'm 100% aware I just blew their son in the bathroom 5 mins ago. Stay tuned.
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
I spent three hours in the ER last night to figure out that my friend just had to take a shit
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
Randomize
