whats up tonight?
Ice cream, wine, and teabags... Not the earl grey kind
i barfeds in our rink
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
If a cop comes up to me I'm whipping out my cock, swinging it around and singing the national anthem
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
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