this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
Also, I called my liver hardcore in front of vet students last night and then wound up having three of them trying to palpate it. So...not saying that again.
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
Randomize
