did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
She was mid-sentence and then BOOM the hammock broke off the tree. I about pissed myself. Hot Sprite and Vodka make the world go round.
Getting cock-blocked by Jeff Bridges. NOT OKAY.
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
Randomize
