ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
my dentist asked me why my tooth was chipped, i told him i couldn't remember. i think he understands.
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
surgery went fine. i cant breath out of my right nostril though. lets not eat peas anymore when we are drunk.
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
Don't drink and shop. I went for happy hour and came home with a fog machine. I now have no other choice but to scare the shit out of my neighbors with it.
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize
