sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
If the blood belongs to whoever dumped glitter all over my couch than the motherfucker got what was coming to them. If not, I hope they're ok.
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
You offered him a “Sorry I Blew Your Brother” Blowjob. How does that make it right?
I promised him it would be better than the one I gave his brother which is really nice of me since their actually only half brothers and his brother is cuter
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