I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
So we get back to the hotel room and Tom strips off his clothes... His first sexual act as my fiance? Helicopter dick. I gave him a high five.
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
You're the reason why I want to be a better drunk
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
You had sex with a Scottish dude with a peg leg....how could I NOT tell that story??
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