Sometimes when I whip my dick out it looks REAL impressive. This, was NOT one of those times.
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?
I come back upstairs and she's leaning over sink full of vomit saying 'oh my god it's the chili'
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
There was a slutty maid costume on the floor when I woke up, but the house was trashed. Either she's been fired or got promoted, I'm not sure which.
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
then this guy just runs in screaming, "cant you see my daughter pissed herself???!!!" and that was the start of my 2016.
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
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