totally just realized while washing my face that Cetaphil looks like semen.
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do... and then you need to delete the history so you're girlfriend doesn't see it.
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
Randomize
