i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
His hospital is closing...I consider it "sorry you're losing your job" sex.
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
So I'll bring my machete and we can smoke your shit.
Out of context, that is a hilariously scary message.
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize
