Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
using my metrocard to split lines. it says optimism on the back. i am optimistic that you will appear at my door and help me finish all these drugs.
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
Our love of vodka is more proof than a maternity test
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