Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
I wish we could go back in time and find our best farts ever
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
I don't think the car's salesman understands that I am about to vomit on him.
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
I will come to your office dressed as a bloody mary, hug you then leave is that a good plan?
yes. bring a barf bucket too. just. in. case.
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
He's the first man I've met that knows more about Harry Potter than I do. He shops at Goodwill and has a Game of Thrones cookbook in his apartment. This is my soulmate.
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
I don't think I've ever had this many people offer me blow before. 3 o'clock on a Thursday. I keep good company.
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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