you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
What do I wear to meet his family/put his dog to sleep? Is there even an appropriate outfit for this occasion?
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
Randomize
