we need to go to the store. i'm tired of having bud light for breakfast.
do you want me to pick up budweiser instead?
You know how i spent all of black friday on the plane? Well guess who's getting a x-mas gift from skymall?!!??
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
I gargles a mimosa for breakfast. It's gonna be a killer Monday.
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
Randomize
