I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
I wonder what it would be like to go to the dry cleaners and not have to inform them that all my clothes are stained with booze.
The beer is more important than you right now.
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
I was at that stage of drunk where it seemed appropriate to just make out with everyone. As like a greeting.
I hear you
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
so, i guess i gotta chill on showing up to work hungover... someone anonymously left a bible in my work mailbox (no one else got one)
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
I think I may be going on too many job interviews. I've started to bring up Shonda Rhimes in my interview answers.
Randomize
