I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
even in the morning, she still thinks my british accent is real.
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
This is the prime rib incident all over again
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
I woke up to a stripper (who added me on Facebook) messaging me reminding me to cancel my card if I can't find it
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
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