Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
organizing the empties. That sober.
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
The following message is brought to you by IMSOFUCKINGSORRY. Dude I'm really sorry I got you arrested last night. You are allowed to choose a repayment plan from the following options: Money, weed, or a single kick to the balls any time within the next calender months. Repayment outside of the aforementioned options can be negotiated and considered within reason.
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
You're a waste of cheezeits
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
I'm sorry I never said I wasn't coming home last night. To my defense I did type and send a text, only I was too drunk to realize I sent it to the guy I was with instead of you.
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
I just learned that the grill marks on a Burger King burger patty are actually previously burnt on there with a radioactive spray-on liquid and McDonald's french fries are actually 5% potato.
Randomize