we're blogging at a bar
I wish I could punch you in the face.
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
I just had a cup of orange juice and thought it didnt taste right. It didnt have vodka in it.
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
How many people can say they've shit on the floor of a five star hotel?
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
Randomize
