It's a beautiful day for a hangover
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
the table of underagers at this wedding were seated 10ft from the open bar. currently 30 open containers on the table for 5 people. dinner hasn't even been served yet.
I JUST SHOOK HIS GRANDMOTHER'S HAND. WITH COCK HANDS. THIS IS NOT FUNNY.
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
God I need to hump something, right now.
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
I'm, like, this 🤏🏼 close to buying crocs
And you're also 🤏🏼 to never putting your dick inside me again
Randomize
