Texts From Last Night · beatles_love64's Favorites

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beatles_love64's Favorites Texts:

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(847): View more from Illinois

All I want to do is go home, strip down to my pants, get in the shower and pee down my leg

Fav 3 1539 1956
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(206): View more from Washington

I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.

Fav 16 2858 3687
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(847): View more from Illinois

I just tried to drunkenly fart the beat of Disturbia by Rihanna

Fav 7 2005 2817
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(904): View more from Florida

What are you doing tonight?

(847): View more from Illinois

Watching dora the explorer and pining for a sex life.

Fav 15 1050 4406
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(847): View more from Illinois

And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.

(1-847): View more from Illinois

I should injure you considerably.

Fav 86 4406 1895
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(847): View more from Illinois

Women are like Alzheimers patiens. You can compliment them a million times in a day, but the next day is always a wash, you have to start all over.

Fav 35 1789 3181
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(847): View more from Illinois

his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts

Fav 11 4402 1324
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(847): View more from Illinois

Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party

Fav 15 7117 930
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