So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
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