My hair reeks of homosexuality.
It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
my fingers and penis are no longer on speaking terms. My penis is too jealous of where my fingers get to go.
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
You can't buy drugs with a ziplock bag full of quarters, chuck-e-cheese coins, and a starbucks giftcard.
watch me
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
Randomize