I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
I am spending my child support on dildos
It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
I just made this asian woman on the boardwalk that was giving 20 dollar massages upset after I asked her if a happy ending comes with it.
Tiger Woods should have just walked in, gave everyone a high five, and left.
It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
but the good news is i woke up with 15 dollars in my pocket so i probably sold my phone instead of puking on it
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
He googled "how long will i be drunk" and just started crying
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
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