Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
Will you please bring me a line of coke at work without asking questions?
Just pretend you're riding a unicorn through space. Thats how I deal with the stirrup situation at the gyno office.
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
what the fuck is wrong with you
Do you want me to go chronologically or alphabetically?
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
Randomize
