Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
we're making bets on your personal life
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
Definitely just found that pen in the microwave. What the fuck.
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
I woke up in a tow truck cuddling plan b. Can you pick me up?
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
Just made a drug contact standing in the sandwich line in the dining hall. Is this real life?
You're my fucking hero.
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
Randomize
