my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
I wish the iPhone would register texts from 11:59 as "Last Year" instead of "Yesterday."
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
Wanna guess where my charger was last night.....in my cooler with my beer. I put it in there because I knew I would never forget my beer.
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
Randomize
