Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
captain morgan taught me last night that resee's puffs are way better when eaten straight out of the sink.
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
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