I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
He doesn't belong with God. He belongs face-down in a pile of his own excrement, vomit, blood and semen. Then pissed on by Satan.
See, it wasn't that I broke my nose having sex. Its that I forgot about the bedposts...
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
You don't know the true meaning of fear until your girlfriend's niece insists on sitting on your lap with 20 mg of Viagra coursing through your veins.
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
Had phone sex with my boss who I still haven’t seen in person. How’s your Monday ?
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