i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
Hooker in the library. I repeat, we have a hooker in the library. This is not a drill.
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
you sternly forced jackson to start preheating the oven around midnight so you could make bagels in the morning
you were serious about those bagels
I am thankful for thumbs.
Because without thumbs, we would be dolphins.
Land dolphins.
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
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