OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
you were so drunk you slurred your pauses
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
Randomize
