How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
I changed the background on my phone to a picture of you so whenever I go to look at porn or text another girl I'll have second thoughts
Am I supposed to find that romantic?
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
I made it crystal clear I'm only upset because he's not anywhere fit to be a father of my unborn zygote
I just realized I'm currently not eating carbs, drinking alcohol or having sex. 2014 is off to a horrible start.
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
Okay, so when I go to meet your grandma, let's do a quick cum check to we don't have another "what's that on your face?" situation.
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
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