she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
I asked the subway guy how many cookies he thought I could smuggle into the bar. He said it looked like a 6 packer. he was correct
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
Were not even through the second month of the year and I potentially may have torpedoed a marriage...
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
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