my dad just beat the shit out of me cuz i blew my nose on one of my dirty t shirts and he saw it and thought it was cum.
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
i wish i could tell you the night didnt begin with me drinking alone
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
Remind me later when I want to buy more drinks that there's a 20 in my bra
Randomize
