Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
I put my bosses number in my phone as "Do not call," I shouldve known my drunk curiosity would overcome any desire I had to keep my job.
again?
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
some girl at the bar told me my beard would tickle every inch of her body till she joy puked her face off.... that was so random and odd i just had to buy her a drink for having the guts to say it to me. WTF
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
He seems like a nice guy. I mean, I know he's married and he's essentially paying me to be his side hoe, but he really seems like a good person.
Looks like I accidentally stole two of your beers and left my pants at your place.
How did you leave without pants?
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
Randomize
