just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
I made it to work. Still drunk. Definitely pregnant.
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
