His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
No, I'm not keeping her! I can't become an adulterer and a dog stealer in the same 24 hours...
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
Drunk enough that you donated $50 to taco bell, because they serve a great purpose.
So which one of you fuckers changed my backgrounds while I was passed out to me holding a chicken like the statue of liberty?
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
What am I supposed to say? "Hey remember last spring when I did an ergonomic assessment on your office, well here's an ergo for your dick."
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
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