Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
Woke up to a huge puddle of water in the living room floor, apparently I made an indoor snowman.
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
Literally just stood behind a guy in line at Walmart get his card declined when he attempted to purchase condoms. That's rock bottom.
That’s all I need in life: vibrators, butt plugs, strawberry lube, and sour gummies
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