Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
So we walked by this chick's house and she starts yelling at her boyfriend "STOP HITTING ME WITH YOUR DICK"
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
After we finished having phone sex he proceeded to serenade me with Ave Maria. It was magical.
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
I woke up to the smell of shame and vomit in my hair... went to the bathroom to shower and passed out... woke back up naked with the blow dryer on... thanks for making my birthday a success
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
Randomize
