i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
I'm eating my dinosaur chicken nuggets in the order they would die in the food chain.
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
FUCK YOU VODKA I'M TRYING TO ADULT RIGHT NOW
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
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