I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
I think I may have appendicitis, but the house is like two blocks from the hospital so I'm just gonna go and drink anyway.
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
Randomize
