Alcohol only hurts me because he loves me.
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
Curdled. you forgot that word. It was a curdled buttery nipple shot.
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
Two guys I banged regularly got married this week. I need vodka.
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
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