The bar is so dead the tender gave us free shots for staying. They mixed 2pac and phil collins. That's worth at least three shots.
I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
worst hand job ever. my dick is about as raw as that sushi your mom wanted me to try.
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
The gate guard just said to me, "I almost didn't recognize you in uniform. Welcome back." I think I need to lay off the booze.
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
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