I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
As I was throwing up blood I assured concerned onlookers that I had simply "eaten a lot of ketchup today"
I just almost puked & then I panicked and forced it back down because I thought I would be a waste of the apple turnover I ate.. I'm that hungover
Omg I can't even...
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
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