You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
He told me he loved me. I didn't know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
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