hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
Don't pass out before midnight like you did last year. See how much your year sucked
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
Found a fruit roll up in my pocket this morning. This means my daughter has a peach blunt wrap in her lunchbox.
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
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