i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
ALWAYS CAPS LOCK. IS THERE EVER A SITUATION THAT DOES NOT CALL FOR CAPS LOCK? NO.
Sexting? Sexting in caps lock seems rather unnerving.
I WANT YOUR BODY AND I WANT IT NOW.
I rest my case.
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
Muscle is literally tearing itself off of my shins. No I am not going on another bar crawl with you.
I'll pay?
Pick me up at 9.
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
I REALLY NEED TO STOP CELEBRATING THAT FUCKING HOLIDAY
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
Randomize
