What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
Really stoned me is having a very serious, intent conversation with my mom about egg rolls and koolaid flavors.
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
Dude...are you really going to start sexting during our friend's memorial service?
I wear drunk well.
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
Randomize
