do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
She def said "you had your chance!" after telling me she had a boyfriend. Like a pile of dogshit lecturing me on how I missed out on having itself stuck to the bottom of my shoe.
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
When you text me tomorrow to remind me to mail your parking pass, also remind me to make sure i did NOT pack my vibrator for this family vacation
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
People have been asking me if I'm going to the reunion lately. It occurs to me that everyone wants me there to feel that much better about themselves.
I have more sex toys than shoes - HOW AM I SINGLE?!?!?
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
Randomize
