your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
How was your Memorial Day?
Don't remember... but I do have an American flag painted on my boob signed by a Staff Sargent... Oh God, I hope that's his military rank and not a nick name.
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
Woke up at 4:30am to my little brother shaking me. Apparently I fell asleep naked on my kitchen table waiting for the toaster to pop. 2 years of college completed and i still havent learned my drinking limit...
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
I've had more sex since the twins moved in than I'd had in the previous four years. They are the best wingman ever.
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
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