I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
Said he had been eating pineapple for a week before our 1st date. Not sure if thankful for his consideration or offended by his assumption.
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
You claimed your dick was a divining rod, spun in a circle 3 times and walked into the bar you stopped in front of...consequently there was a bikini shoot going on
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
WHO INVENTED HANGOVERS WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
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